Wednesday, July 20, 2005

One Giant Leap For Coca-Cola

36 years since a shadowy group of actors and crew under the orders of President Nixon/NASA/New World Order assembled on an early morning at the old Desilu Studios lot in Hollywood to begin to perpetuate one of the greatest myths in history, the first manned moon landing... (and if you believe that...). Seriously, two heroes by the name of Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin set foot on our favorite white orb for the very first time since Walter Cronkite.

The good news is that Armstrong and Aldrin (along with their buddy Michael Collins, who was orbiting the moon) made it back in one piece. The bad news, Cronkite never left, but he did found a relatively successful colony of moonbats. Many moonbats have migrated to earth and have infested innumerable respected institutions like the media, the Democrat party, our educational facilities, and Denny's restaurant chain.

Outwardly, they look human, but the usual giveaway that you may be facing a moonbat is the strong aroma, their unusual speech patterns, the vacant look in their eyes, and the "Che Guevara" t-shirts. Moonbats should be treated with extreme caution, because you never know when they will spread their wings, let out a blood-curdling scream, and spew moonbat guano.


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